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Tranquility

As long as there are children in the world, there will never be any real peace.

Trouble

Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.

Underachievement

The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the lawnmower.

Underachievement

Because soaring with the eagles requires so much more effort.

Unreliability

Failure is simply an opportunity to begin again, next time some place else, where they like to hire losers.

Values

You wouldn't believe how little we spent on a poster to show how much you're worth.

Victory

Winners never fly higher than when they're bouncing up and down on the egos of those they've defeated.

Virtue

You must tweet the change you want to see in the world. It won't affect anything, but at least people will know exactly where you stood during the fight. Doing nothing. Like the poser you are.

Wealth

All I ask is for a chance to prove that money can't buy happiness.

Whining

If you expect to score points by whining, join a European soccer team.

Who Killed John F. Kennedy?

Winners

Because nothing says "you're a loser" more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner.

Wisdom

Sometimes the only difference between a budding genius and a blooming idiot is where they choose to take a stand.

Wishes

When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

Wishes (Cow)

If wishes were horses then dreamers would ride. But they're much more like cattle, so best grab a shovel.

Work

When I was told I had to pull my weight around here, I didn't realize that included everyone else's.

Worth

Just because you're necessary doesn't mean you're important.

You Are Special

If you require additional affirmation, get a puppy. The rest of us are trying to work.

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