Our burden is to take bold, dramatic actions. Should those fail, your burden is to suffer bold, dramatic consequences.
Those who demand we all do more with less somehow always end up on the more side of the ledger.
The most effective tool in keeping me healthy has been my overwhelming distrust of doctors.
A rigorous process through which often dubious ideas gain broad scientific consensus before becoming unquestionable dogma.
A man never stands so tall as when he stoops to tell a child, "There's no way you can do that - no freaking way."
Quitters never win, winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit are idiots.
If you wake up early, work hard, and never give up, your dreams can come true if you're born rich.
Some are destined to soar on the wings of eagles while being torn apart by beaks and talons.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. Government is how we implement those ideas at scale.
There is no idea so ridiculous that you can't find a professor teaching future generations to believe it.
When we told you to follow your instincts, we didn't know yours were to create obstacles all the time.
If you believe in yourself firmly enough, you can attempt not just the difficult, but even the truly ridiculous.
The pain you feel today will be the strength you feel tomorrow. Or you could die from it. It's hard to know with these things sometimes.
Our customers won't care how much we know until they know how much we care, so we've had to get really good at faking both.
We regret to inform you that the flying cars we promised aren't feasible, but we do hope you'll enjoy the spying vacuums.
Never attribute to stupidity that which can be adequately explained by a pathological bloodlust for control.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions, and now they’re bringing it right to my driveway and taxing me for it.
My life is complicated enough already without trying to introduce organization into it.
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies right to our faces.
Don’t let anyone tell you that dreams can’t come true; my life’s turned into a long, waking nightmare.
Because a Frozen, Lifeless Hellscape Bathing in Radiation is Looking Pretty Good to Me Right Now.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change history, usually by rewriting it.
If you find yourself struggling with motivation here, try to picture yourself suddenly unemployed. Because you might be.
When the time comes for us to burn the candle at both ends, we’re grateful you’re here, being our candle.
Thanks for all your well-intended criticism. If I’m not perfect by now, it’s definitely not your fault.
We’ve got a talent for explaining tomorrow why the predictions we made yesterday didn’t come true today.
We bring the people of the world together so you can watch them tear each other apart.