Business As Usual

Distinction

Looking sharp is easy when you haven't done any work.

Consulting

If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem.

Demotivation

Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people.

Apathy

If we don't take care of the customer, maybe they'll stop bugging us.

Retirement

Because you've given so much of yourself to the company that you don't have anything left we can use.

Sacrifice

All we ask here is that you give us your heart.

Adaptation

The bad news is robots can do your job now. The good news is we're now hiring robot repair technicians. The worse news is we're working on robot-fixing robots- and we do not anticipate any further good news.

Accountability

A word leaders start to use right before the scapegoating begins.

Break the Rules

On your own time. Here, you get paid to conform.

Dedication

When the time comes for us to burn the candle at both ends, we’re grateful you’re here, being our candle.

Downsizing

Because we're all in this together but there's always room for one less.

Frustration

When all else fails, look to the healing power of brute force.

Inspiration-Struggle

If you find yourself struggling with motivation here, try to picture yourself suddenly unemployed. Because you might be.

Responsibility

Water Isn't the Only Thing that Rolls Downhill.

Tasks

By Doing Just a Little Bit Every Day, You Can Gradually Let the Job Completely Overwhelm You.

Work

When I was told I had to pull my weight around here, I didn't realize that included everyone else's.

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Business As Usual

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