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Ambition

The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly.

Believe in Yourself

Because the rest of us think you're an idiot.

Consulting

If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem.

Distinction

Looking sharp is easy when you haven't done any work.

Foresight

Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those busy proving them right.

Get To Work

You aren't being paid to believe in the power of your dreams.

Government

If you think the problems we create are bad, just wait until you see our solutions.

Idiocy

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Interns

The experience we're giving you is invaluable. That's why we're not paying you anything.

Knowledge

I believe that children are our future. And that terrifies me.

Limitations

Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can walk.

Mediocrity-Penguins

Just because we accept you as you are doesn't mean we've abandoned hope you'll improve.

Meetings

None of us is as dumb as all of us.

Mistakes

It could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others.

Motivation

If a pretty poster and a cute saying are all it takes to motivate you, you probably have a very easy job. The kind robots will be doing soon.

Multitasking

The art of doing twice as much as you should half as well as you could.

Perseverance

The courage to ignore the obvious wisdom of turning back.

Potential

Not everyone gets to be an astronaut when they grow up.

Priorities

Hundreds of years from now, it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove... But the world may be different because I did something so bafflingly crazy that my ruins become a tourist attraction.

Procrastination

Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness always pays off now.

Shoot for the Moon

Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. Of course, then your eyeballs will boil and your lungs explode from decompression. But that's what you get for being a damn showoff.

Teams

Together, we can do the work of one.

Teamwork

A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.

Tradition

Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.

Wishes

When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

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