Consistency

It's only a virtue if you're not a screwup.

There is something to be said in doing things wrong the exact same way every time. It’s not a good thing, but still. Take your compliments where you can get them, loser.

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Baldrick
Tiny archers
Dane Cook
The Buffalo Bills
Disaffected college students

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Achievement

You can do anything you set your mind to when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.

Ambition

The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly.

Friendship

A friend is just a stranger you haven't alienated yet.

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Consistency

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